holiday dread....err joy

I swear every year that I won't let it happen......that I won't hear the Christmas music playing in the stores, and see the decorations going up, and immediately feel PANIC! I tell myself that I will be more organized this year, that I will start the decorating early, that I will have the cards ready to send by Thanksgiving, that I will sit back and bask in the SPIRIT of the season rather than getting caught up in the flurry to buy, buy, buy.

But this morning, I felt it all rushing back...... that familiar sense of panic, that feeling that there is NO WAY I am going to get it all done. Instead of feeling JOY, I felt what could only be described as dread, and I felt the urge to cry right there in the Starbucks line, with Christmas music playing in the background, fake snow on the windows, and cranberry bliss bars on the counter.

I stood there knowing that I had allowed myself to veer off course, that I was getting caught up in all the things I had vowed not to, and that if I didn't put a stop to it, I would be looking back on this Season with regret. So today, I am determined to put an end to the madness, to get back in touch with the holy in the holidays, and to figure out a way to dwindle my to-do list down to only those things that truly matter......that add sparkle and magic and meaning to this busy time of year.

I am going to take my time. I am going to light a fire in the fireplace. I am going to make hot chocolate for these 2 little angels. I am going to select a few gifts that I know they will love. I am going to pull out the decorations that make our home merry and bright. I am going to capture the small moments. I am going to give of my time to those that are in need. I am going to enjoy our time in Mississippi with family. I am going to fill the basket with our favorite Christmas stories. I am going to write in my journal. I am going to crank up the Christmas playlist in the car. I am going to pray and give thanks.